E.R. at Valley View Medical Center

The first picture was taken the night Jack and I arrived at the E.R. in Cedar City, the second picture was taken the day after he was born. You can see the significant difference in his appearance and color!

We arrived at the E.R. at Valley View Medical Center October 17th. Once admitted, the nurse came in to do his evaluation and told us that before working in the E.R. he had been working at the NICU in St. George. Obviously, with NICU experience, we expected extra special care and knowledge on Jack's behalf. The nurse took one look at Jack and told us that his "appearance" did not show any signs of dehydration, but that he would follow protocol and check his urine, blood, etc. They drew some urine and told us that his urine was cloudy, showing that he "possibly" was dehydrated and that he "probably" had a bladder infection.

I wondered how a newborn could get a bladder infection...hmmm???

The E.R. Doctor came into our room to do his evaluation. As he entered the room, I had just finished feeding Jack a bottle and about two minutes later Jack started to profusely vomit! As he was vomiting, the Doctor said:

"Oh, way to go Dude, Awesome, way to go, nice job!"

He said those words in a way that made me cringe. I looked at him with angry eyes and thought to myself..."this isn't cool...this has been going on for weeks..."

There was so much vomit on the floor that he had to grab a large towel to soak it up. On his way out the door, he told us there was nothing to be concerned about. Babies "spit up" all the time and "worst case scenario" we would have to feed him a teaspoon, every 20 minutes, at a time until he could eventually handle more. Then, he left.

While he was gone, the nurse returned to place an IV in Jack's arm because he "didn't look dehydrated," but "his urine was showing he was dehydrated" so they were going to give him some fluids "only as a precaution." The nurse began to insert the IV in the front of Jack's elbow. I thought that was a horrible place to insert an IV in a baby since babies are constantly pulling their fists into their face. But, again, what did I know??

The Doctor returned and said, "Well, the good news is...Jack isn't having a stroke because there's some things that we're REALLY bad at here...like strokes...so the good news is it isn't a stroke! He does, however, look like he has a bladder infection and we're REALLY good at treating bladder infections!!"

I asked what the symptoms were for a bladder infection. He explained that bladder infections can make you feel nauseous and vomit. He told me once we got the bladder infection under control that Jack would feel better and stop vomiting. So, in addition to the IV fluids they were starting him on an antibiotic for the "bladder infection."

As he left, the Pediatrician entered the room..."Yep, he doesn't look dehydrated, but we'll go ahead and keep him overnight and observe him and add some human milk fortifier to the breastmilk to help him gain weight." He continued on and on and on...Every word that came out of his mouth was calm, comforting, and led me to think there was nothing to worry about and that Jack would be fine. The fact that he was so calm made me think I should be more calm. If the Doctor is not worried, then why am I so worried??? Then, he started to talk about "the fact" that some DS children have Pyloric Stenosis. Pyloric Stenosis is a narrowing of the Pylorus, the opening of the small intestines into the stomach. He went on to explain that this usually doesn't occur until children are 3 months of age, but, "as a precaution" he would order an Upper GI for Jack in the morning. Before leaving, he assured me that Jack was "fine" and everything was going to be "ok" and I believed him!

With the clothes on my back, my diaper bag, and phone...Jack and I spent the night at the hospital. That night, Jack's oxygen levels dropped down to 70%! Since he was having trouble breathing, the nurse decided it would be best to put him on oxygen. The nurse was concerned and asked me if anyone had spoken to me about seeing a specialist? I thought "specialist?" and answered "no." Jack continued to eat a tiny bit and vomit more than he had eaten all night.

Morning arrived and Jack and I were led down to the Radiology Department for his scheduled Upper GI. I had to undress him and feed him a bottle filled with contrast (a white substance) so the Doctor could view the fluid in the X-Ray and see where it was going. As I was doing this, Jack began to vomit and the nurse assisting was astounded that the color was icky dark green. The Radiologist, however, viewed the screen and concurred..."Yep, it's DEFINITELY Pyloric Stenosis."

Jack and I were led back to our room. Approximately ten minutes later, a man entered the room introducing himself as the "transport guy." He said Jack needed to be transported up to Primary Children's Hospital in Salt Lake City to undergo a "simple" surgery for "Pyloric Stenosis." He asked me how soon I could leave and I told him we could leave as soon as they were ready.

I called my mom, in tears, and told her we were being transported, by ambulance, up to Primary Children's and I needed her to pack me a small bag.

In the meantime, the Pediatrician called and asked me if I felt I could transport Jack myself or if I would prefer him being taken in an ambulance. I couldn't believe he thought Jack would be ok driving in the car with me when it was obvious he needed a Nurses care...what was he thinking??? I told him I would prefer the ambulance and he agreed.

My mom arrived with our small bag of "things." After all, we were only expected to be gone for a couple of days. I gave her a teary hug goodbye and she told me she would follow me shortly and meet me up at Primary's.

The ambulance ride was anti-climatic! The driver was boring, but I didn't care...I was just glad I didn't have to talk to her. Occasionally, the nurse from the back would announce updates for me and let me know Jack was doing ok. About 30 minutes before our arrival at Primary's , Carrie Underwood's new song "Temporary Home" came on the radio...I listened to the words...

"this is my temporary home, not where I belong, windows and rooms that I'm passing through...this is just a stop on the place to where I'm going...I'm not afraid because I know...this is my temporary home."

I listened to those words, thought about Jack and tried to hold back my tears. After all, I needed to be strong for Jack...not sad...and, I needed the driver to think I was brave too!!

Our uneventful ride finally came to an end...the front entrance of Primary Children's Hospital. The Nurse and EMT gently removed Jack from the back of the ambulance and I followed them into the E.R.

My sister Robyn was there, with open arms awaiting our arrival...

The First 2 Weeks

We arrived home from the hospital on a Wednesday and were scheduled to meet with the Pediatrician the following Friday.

In the meantime, all of us were "coping" with the news and doing research on our own about Down Syndrome. My parents also did some research and felt inspired to contact a friend and Neonatal Pediatrician, Elder Devn Cornish, that they knew to seek advice. This conversation was one of the best things that happened for our family. Elder Cornish told my parents that their 6th child has DS. All he could say was what a great blessing their son has been in their lives. He said DS children are not hard to manage and are happy. He said they are remarkably spiritual people and this will be a spiritual blessing beyond our imagination. He also told us that grief is a normal process and once the shedding of tears and grief has passed we will see this as a wonderful blessing and experience great joy! I found great comfort in his words and a relief to know that "grieving" was normal and knew everything was going to be ok.

On Friday, we arrived at the Pediatrician's office and he had printed out numerous sheets of info about Down Syndrome and passed them over to us. He suggested we watch a video online and to stay away from websites other than the main website for DS. We, of course, had a million questions and Devon did most of the talking because my voice was still too shaky and I couldn't seem to have any conversation without crying.

Devon specifically asked the Pediatrician, point blank, "How much experience do you have working with Down Syndrome?"

He responded, "We're all trained to know what to look for and what to do..."

Next question, "We've heard they can have heart problems...should we have his heart checked?"

He responded, "Well, there is no heart murmur, but we will schedule an Echo within the next week."

Then, Devon asked, "I've read that they can tend to have intestinal problems...should we have his intestines checked?"

He said, "Is he pooping?" "Yeah, a little," we said.

"Well, then you don't need to worry about that."

And the questions continued...

I was concerned about the fact that he wasn't eating very well and was very lethargic. He had also started throwing up after eating. It was bright yellow in color and seemed like much more than what he was eating. At the time, I was lucky if he would drink half an ounce to an ounce of breastmilk. The Doctor attributed it to Reflux. He told me that Reflux is a very common problem with babies who have DS. He wrote out a prescription for Reflux and then weighed him. He had lost 2 more ounces since leaving the hospital. The Doctor wasn't concerned and attributed it to being newborn, small, and possibly that he was Down Syndrome. We left and that was that.

Over the weekend the vomiting continued and became worse! It turned into projectile vomiting. He was unable to hold anything down, his face was looking thin and his coloring was bad! I thought he might have jaundice so I called the doctor, took him into the office to have him tested for jaundice, and they weighed him again.

He had lost another 4 ounces since Friday. Still the doctor wasn't concerned. The test results came back negative for jaundice. The Doctor called and told me to make sure Jack was eating 1.5 ounces every 2 hours and to keep him held in a upright position for at least 20 minutes after every feed. He also wanted me to bring Jack back to the office on Friday for another weight check. So, I took Jack home, set my alarm on my phone for every 2 hours, and wouldn't allow myself to put Jack down.

The week continued. Luckily, both my mom and mother-in-law were there to help with the kids and give me moral support.

During that week, Jack had an appointment in the Radiology Department for the Echo on his heart. As we we sat in the waiting room, I watched other women who were pregnant waiting for their Ultrasound and I began to cry. I'm still not sure why? Part of me was sad because I looked at each of these women, with their beautiful baby tummy, and remembered that a week earlier that was me. However, I had no idea Jack would be born with DS and wondered if any of these women would share the same fate. I was still dealing with my emotions and trying to wrap my head around all of the shocking news! Shortly, Jack's name was called and we were led back to a dark room by a tall, un-friendly, man who would soon be doing Jack's Echo. I undressed Jack and laid his tiny, frail body on top of the cold table and the Echo began. Jack was very calm and relaxed, but awake! The Ultrasound Tech looked at me and asked in a monotone voice, "Did they tell you to sleep deprive him before this?" I said, "No, why would I need to sleep deprive him?" I was thinking...{{Hello? He's only 7 days old? How am I supposed to sleep deprive him? Dummy?!}} The Tech answered, "SO HE WOULD SLLEEEEP!" My mom and I exchanged glances and rolled our eyes...oh, brother!

Each day, we would attempt to feed Jack. He was so lethargic that it was nearly impossible to get him to suck on the bottle. I had completely stopped trying to breastfeed him and was pumping and feeding him a bottle so that I could keep track of how much he was eating. It would take him nearly an hour to finish an ounce. As soon as he was finished drinking, we would immediately put him in an upright position and hold him there hoping he would keep his feed down. However, every meal was projected back up and was becoming worse and darker in color. It was no longer yellow, it didn't look like milk, it was green...dark green! Again, the Doctor wasn't concerned. He wanted me to wait until Friday to bring Jack in to be weighed and continued to attribute the vomit to reflux. In the meantime, I was exhausted spending all day pumping, feeding Jack, holding Jack, changing Jack's constant spit-up-on wet clothes, and hoping/praying for a miracle that he would hold his food down and start to plump up and wake up!

Jack was gray, thin, and, at times, seemed nearly comatose! There were times he would briefly open his eyes as if to look at us in pain. When holding him, he would squirm and sometimes cry out as if his tummy was hurting. I remember telling my mom that I felt something was wrong with his intestines, but what did I know?...the Doctor kept reassuring me that everything was fine...so why was there any need to worry?

Finally, Friday morning came. My mom and I arrived at the office hopeful that Jack had gained some weight. We undressed him, laid him on the scale, and it read 4lbs 13oz. The nurse said, "that can't be right...take him off the scale, I will re-set it, and we will weigh him again." So, I took him off the scale, we re-weighed him and it still read 4lbs 13oz. Again, the nurse was unsure about the weight, didn't think it was right, and told me to follow him to the other room to weigh him on a different scale. We weighed him and he was still 4lbs 13oz.

I was in SHOCK! The nurse told me the Doctor was out of the office and he would have him call me later. I was trying to hold back my tears, put Jack in his car seat, and, as we were leaving the office, my mom told the front desk girl to make sure the Doctor called me later that day because I was frantic!!

As we left the office, I had no words...I was frustrated, concerned, and MAD! In the car, I told my mom that I wished the Doctor would just send us to the Emergency Room.

Later that day, the Doctor called and told me he wanted me to start fortifying my breastmilk with formula. He wasn't concerned. The 16 ounces of weight Jack had lost didn't worry him and he put me at ease, which he was very good at! He told me we were going to fortify his feeds and had no doubt that Jack would start gaining weight. He wanted me to call him on Sunday and he would meet me at his office to weigh Jack.

For the next two days, we fortified all of his feeds. On average, babies are expected to gain at least an ounce a day...so, that is what we were hoping for. However, Jack continued to vomit and vomit and vomit. Saturday night, Devon and I asked both of our families to fast for Jack. He had also received a blessing late Friday afternoon and we were fasting, praying, and hoping for a miracle. I knew something was wrong...very wrong, but didn't know what and knew deep down in my heart that Jack would not live if he continued to lose such large amounts of weight. Sunday morning arrived and my mom encouraged me to call Jack's Pediatrician to beg him to meet me as soon as possible.

I called the Doctor and he would not be available to meet with me until 6:30 or 7:00 that night. I hung up the phone in tears. My baby was in pain, unable to eat or keep any food down, and looked awful! I didn't know what else to do...Devon was still in Chicago and even though my mom and mother-in-law were there, I felt extremely alone and terrified!

Soon after, Devon's mom took charge and told me she had had enough and was calling the Pediatrician! She immediately called him and told him Jack looked severely dehydrated and that he was dying! The Pediatrician asked to speak with me and said, "do you think he is dehydrated? Is he having any wet diapers?" I told him I really wasn't sure. I had been so focused on all of the vomiting and attempts to feed him and keep his food down that I hadn't noticed how many diapers I had been changing. Helen, Devon's mom, took the phone back and told him Jack needed to go to the Emergency Room. He told us that if that is what we thought then he would go ahead and phone the E.R. and tell them we were on our way...

Welcome Baby Jack

Now that Jack is 3 months old, I thought I should officially welcome him into our family and introduce him to the rest of our friends and loved ones via the blog!

There are many reasons for not blogging or sharing my feelings about this entire experience, but I now feel that I am in a place where I am ready to openly share my thoughts about our sweet little boy.

First, I would like to preface this post by saying that much of what I am going to share is personal to our family, emotional, spiritual, and and will continue to be an on-going journey. Much of what has happened over the last 3 months was unexpected and something that I would like to write down for posterity sake as well as for others who may or are experiencing something similar.

This definitely has been a joyous time in our lives, but there have also been moments of great sadness, fear, and uncertainty.

With much love and joy in our hearts we are so proud and happy to announce the newest addition to our family and we are so glad that he is here!!

Jack Robert was born October 3, 2010 at 9:30pm. He was 5lbs, 13oz and 18inches long.

Earlier that day, I woke up and was experiencing a few contractions with light spotting. I called the Doctor and he assured me there was nothing to worry about unless my contractions increased. I wasn't due for another 2 weeks and Devon was in Chicago training for a new job. I did not want to be in Labor and wanted the baby to wait until the scheduled induction day on October 8th. However, the contractions continued all. day. long.

My sister and her family had spent the weekend with me and were planning to go home later that day. I kept reassuring her that I was not in Labor and that they should go home. Finally, they packed up their car and left to go home. Soon after, my contractions got worse!! I texted her and told her I was going to the hospital and she told me they would turn around so that she could go to the hospital with me.

She and I hopped in the car at 7:30pm and arrived at the hospital shortly after. I sobbed all the way the way there....I did not want to be in Labor and did not want to deliver this baby without my hubby. I was really hoping the nurse would tell me it was just false labor and send me home. However, once there, the nurse checked me and announced that I was dilated 5cm. The tears wouldn't stop flowing from my eyes! I thought, "how can this be? How can I be in Labor and have my husband 2,000 miles away!!" I was scared, mad, and excited all at the same time. I called Devon and told him we were having a baby tonight and kept him on speaker phone.

A quick epidural, a couple painful pushes, and our cute little purple bundle had arrived. I took one look at him and thought something was "off". He was so purple...dark purple! And, there were no cries! The nurses quickly rushed him over to the warming table to do vitals and were speaking in hushed tones without relaying any information back to me. I thought, "phew, the worst is over...he's here...I did it...yay!" But, there was a dark cloud of unexplained gloominess in the air. I brushed those feelings and thoughts aside and thought it must be because Devon isn't here.

The nurses were still speaking in hushed tones and I heard my OB ask, "Is there a heart murmur?" Immediately, they responded "no" and he nodded his head "ok." I thought, "heart murmur? oh, good, no heart murmur."

The nurses pumped a large amount of amniotic fluid from his stomach and were having a hard time getting his temperature up so they gave him to me and laid him on me skin to skin hoping that would raise his temperature.

I finally got to hold our sweet little boy! He had tons of blond hair and cute chubby cheeks. He was tiny! Tinier than all my other babies. As I held him, he nestled right into my chest and my heart melted! All of these months waiting for him and wondering what he would look like and he was finally here and he was perfect and beautiful!!

After cuddling with him for a couple of hours, the pediatrician arrived to do his evaluation. He walked in the room announcing..."So, we hear he looks like Blake..." I had never met this Doctor before. I had chosen him based on local referrals and other than that had no idea what to expect of him. It was about Midnight and he looked at me confused and unsure of what to say and blurted out..."I don't know if you overheard the nurses talking or me talking to the nurses, but we think there is a slight chance the baby has Down Syndrome...oh, I shouldn't have said anything...I wish I could take that back...he probably doesn't...oh, I shouldn't have said anything...just put that out of your mind tonight and try to get some sleep because he probably doesn't...Besides, if you think he looks like your other kids...he's probably fine...they don't usually look like family members, but he probably doesn't and I wish I hadn't said anything..."

I was still in this euphoric-I've-just-had-a-baby-state-of-mind and couldn't get any words to come out of my mouth?!?! I was frozen and didn't know what to say! I just wanted that dumb Doctor who had just broken my husband-less world to leave! I just looked at my sister with tears in my eyes and she said, "it's ok, it doesn't matter, it's ok, you're going to be ok!!" I believed her and nodded my head and just looked at my precious bundle feeling confused and unsure of what this all meant.

I immediately called Devon. It was 1am in Chicago and as far as he was concerned everything was fine. The baby was here, he was healthy, I was fine, and he could relax knowing we were all fine! I told him they thought the baby might have Down Syndrome and that was it...I couldn't speak much more than that...it was hard enough saying those two words. He had a million questions, but I didn't have any answers and we hung up the phone.

Soon after, our brother-in-law, Curtis, and Devon's dad arrived to give both me and Jack a blessing. I don't remember much of what was said, but the feeling of that room was crowded. I do believe in guardian angels and I know they were watching over us that night. I still felt uneasy, but, at the same time, felt peace.

I was finally escorted to my recovery room. Robyn and I "tried" to sleep, but how could we sleep? I think we both closed our eyes, but our brains were on overdrive! We awoke before 6am and were sobbing. She was crying and I was crying and we couldn't stop...we needed answers, we needed sleep, I needed my husband, and we all needed to know Baby Jack was going to be ok.

The hours and days that followed all seem like a big blur! We still hadn't received an official diagnosis, but as far as we were concerned it didn't matter and we felt he was sent he was sent to the right family. Taylor, Luke, and Blake adored their new baby brother and couldn't seem to stop smothering him with kisses and loves.

Devon finally arrived from Chicago and my sister went home. As far as she was concerned, the worst was over...

Jack and I stayed over at the hospital one additional night because his glucose levels were low and his temperature continued to stay low. His poor little hands and feet were still dark purple and the nurses attributed that to his size and poor temperature. The FISH test for the Down Syndrome still hadn't come back and I had received many texts, emails, phone calls and visits from friends, family, and nurses assuring me that "everything was going to be ok". I even had one nurse go out of her way to explain to me about "A Trip to Holland." It's about planning a trip to Holland, but instead of landing in Holland you've landed in Italy...bla bla bla...

I just wasn't ready to hear any of that or go there...besides, nothing was "official." We were sent home. Everything was fine, other than a huge blood clot on the back of my knee that killed and that Jack still wasn't eating very well. He was very lethargic, hard to get to eat, but, again, I attributed that to him just being a "tired newborn" and thought all would be better once we got home.

The next day, the Pediatrician called with the FISH test results. He said, the test came back positive for Trisomy 21 (Down Syndrome). I couldn't breathe, I couldn't talk, all I could do was hold my sweet, precious baby and cry. He was so beautiful and perfect and yet now I had been told something with my beautiful, perfect little boy was different and life-changing. I wasn't sure how I felt about this news. I was confused, angry, and sad, yet happy and joyful to have this new baby in our home and as a part of our family.

It's hard to explain the feelings I experienced during this time. The best way to explain it is that when I was pregnant, I had a "dream", or so to say, about Jack and what he would be like and learning about the Trisomy 21 wasn't a part of that "dream." All of us went through a period of grief...grief for that baby we thought we thought we were having and grief for Jack and the challenges his life would bring for him in the future. But, every time we hold Jack and look at him we are overwhelmed with a great sense of peace and love for this little guy! Although, he won't be "perfect" in the eyes of the world, he is perfect to us and our hearts grow bigger every time we hold him and love on him and that is all that matters!!

The days and weeks that followed is when all the trauma began...
(to be continued...)

Blogging Again?

It is the end of summer. School has started, Devon FINALLY was hired for a job, and I am 6 weeks away from being induced to have this baby.

Summer went by so fast, I didn't even blink! Our summer, this year, was filled with lots of trips to Salt Lake. Devon interviewed for jobs, like crazy, all summer and was officially offered a job 2 weeks ago. We are so excited to transition from student life to normal life once again. He will start his job Sep. 15th in Chicago for 8 weeks of training and then will resume permanently in Salt Lake once his training is finished.

We have decided I will stay here, with the kids, while he finishes his training and move to Salt Lake once he is done. That way the I have his parents to help me with the kids and with the baby. Hopefully, I don't go into labor before my induction day!

Taylor and Luke are ecstatic to be back in school. It's hard to believe they are both gone all day now. Luke started 1st grade and Taylor is in 3rd. Luke is totally exhausted when he gets home, but loves art and PE and all that good stuff. He just wishes he didn't have to ride the bus home and that I would pick him up every day. Taylor is a happy 3rd grader and knows a lot of kids in her class this year, which helps! She happily watches over Luke at school. She is a little mother hen when it comes to taking care of her brothers and does this regardless of us asking her to.

Here I am, 8 months pregnant, packing up as much as I can before this baby arrives and still teaching Zumba 7 times a week. Zumba is my sanity and I love it! It is the most fun class to teach and the best way (in my opinion) to workout.

We were able to spend the weekend with my family 2 weeks ago. It's amazing how fast our family is growing and it is becoming more rare to have us all in one place at the same time. I love my family and love it when we can be together!

My blogging may be far and a few, but just know that I think of all my little blogging friends and family all of the time and love you all!

10 years ago, on January 15th, I married this adorable guy! Life now is so different, yet so full.

Back then it only took me an hour and a half to wash, dry, fold, and put away laundry. Now, I'm lucky if I get it all washed, folded AND put away in the same day.

What was once a bedroom for 2, is now often shared with one extra small one in-between and another one who arrived during the middle of the night to sleep on the floor.

Mornings are filled with laughter, chocolate milks, the sound of toys clanking, and morning cartoons.

Driving in the car consists of buckling seat belts and tons of questions from the back.

A date night now costs $20+ or more than it used to, but now has more meaning and need than it did before.

Although all of these things have changed, for the better, our love for one another has grown. You are still my best friend. The one I still want to talk to about my day, good or bad. The one I still kiss last goodnight. The one who will watch GLEE episodes with me on our Anniversary. Thank you for the best 10 years of my life!

Blogging Back To Life

About 4 months ago, I sat down at the computer to post about my awesome Edward-Inspired, 30-Something Birthday Party (courtesy of my adorable hubby). I got distracted, returned to post, and discovered my picture cartridge was missing! It had been sitting right next to the computer and when I returned, it was gone! I figured it would show up and I would post about my birthday when it did. However, it has never re-appeared! So, all I have to show for my birthday are these two pictures taken from my cell phone.

It's really a bummer! You'll have to imagine me decked out and dressed for the 80's in hot pink leopard pants, crimped hair, giant hoop earrings, blue eye shadow, netted gloves, and a shirt that says "Like Fer Shur!"
Besides Edward, we had other special visitors for the occasion....Michael and Anne! I'm sure you can imagine Michael's lovely eye rolls and sarcastic chuckles as we clicked pictures of me next to Edward, listened to the New Moon soundtrack, and ate my delicious Edward cake (courtesy of my wonderful hubby...a.k.a, Devon) and yes, it was delicious!!

Michael enjoys teasing me about my little obsession with the Twilight books. With this in mind, a few weeks ago my cousin Christie posted about a sweet video on YouTube about wives and their obsession with Twilight. Immediately, Michael texted me and asked me if I had read her blog for the day or not. I asked why and he said "because it is soooo you." Automatically I was intrigued and went to view her blog, watched the video, and laughed so hard!

Watching this video made me realize that I needed to get back to blogging. More over, I needed to post about my awesome Edward-Inspired 30-Something Birthday party and share this video with all of you Twilight Junkies too!

So, here's to great birthdays, being 30-something, and enjoying fun little thrills in life!!!

Perfection

I am far from being perfect...

I have a scar on my right cheek from having the chicken pox when I was a kid...

I eat way too much chocolate (in fact, I ate 10 Oreos yeterday...YIKES)...

I get my kicks out of watching Daytime Soaps and find myself wondering, during the day, when Jessica's stalker will strike next...ugh!...

When I'm frustrated I occasionally let a few "D" and "S" words slip out of my mouth...you know it's bad when one of your children asks you what "oh ship" means...

BUT, there are days when I experience moments of PERFECTION!!

A perfect day, like today (so far) for me is...

Starting the morning with a really hard, sweat dripping from my forehead-down my legs and arms kind of workout at 6 am...

Getting all 3 children off to school without ANY fighting...

Watching two of the three getting on the bus holding hands...so sweet...

Driving home, ALONE, and getting to listen to whatever kind of music I want...

Cleaning to my favorite tunes...

Admiring newly cleaned counter tops, loaded dishwasher, vacuumed floors, and laundry that is folded AND put away...

Quiet.....aaaaahhhhhh!

I just love it when moments of PERFECTION happen. It's not all of the time, but every now and again it happens and I LOVE IT!

Summer "Slumber Party"

Tupperware parties are so passé. I mean, who ever said that attending a party that primarily focuses on food storage, food preparation, and serving food is exciting?

Candle parties are overdone, overpriced, and, in my opinion, over rated!

More often than not, when I receieve an invitation to a party, such as these, I turn it down or dread going.

Don't get me wrong, the interaction with friends is always fun, the food provided is always good, but I hate feeling obligated to buy something that I don't need or have an interest in owning when I go to one of these things...am I the only one?

Recently, I was invited to a party ...a "slumber party" unlike no other and my dear husband could not wait to have me attend!

Without sharing too many details, I will tell you this...it was definitely a party that focused on what women want {hee hee}.

Have you ever been to a Slumber Party? If not, and if you're ever invited...go! It is hilarious and fun! I was a little hesitant to attend, like all parties I'm invited to, but this one was definitely different and something my dear husband did not care to watch the kids for while I attended. For him, there is no dollar amount when it comes to "our marriage" and he could not wait for me to get home!! Who knew there were so many "antecdotes" to improving "your marriage."

The truth is, I desperately needed a night out with the girls away from the kids and it ended up being totally worth it! It was fun being with the girls and talking about A LOT of CrAzY things! All of the "marriage/romance" enhancing products were hilarious, entertaining, and very interesting (to say the least)!!

I laughed SO hard listening to other people share stories and watching other womens faces as they reacted to certain things that were said or passed around during the party....so funny!

I left feeling slightly rebelious. It was as if this 60's flower child was released from my inner soul and I was anxious to get home and share what I had learned with my hunny and my boy was anxious to hear it!

The night was history and the "antecdotes" were a proven success {ahem}!

Enough said. If you have the opportunity to attend one--go!

Hasn't my summer been so exciting...can't wait to hear more? Check back later with pics and news about the biggest event of the summer...my baby brother's wedding!!

Chips and Cake for Dinner!

Life, as always, has been HECTIC!

I always assume that once school is out (which it has been for 2 1/2 weeks) that life will slow down and I will be able to pamper myself with much needed "ME" time. However, that has not been the case!

As the saying goes, "When it rains, it POURS!" Well, it has been pouring at our house.

Here are a few things I have learned in the past couple weeks:

• Just because school is out and you are no longer in constant contact with other grimy/germy children doesn't mean you can't get STREP THROAT...you can and you WILL!!
• Recovering from strep throat is even MORE awful when your hubby is out of town and won't be home for 2 days!
• You will do WHATEVER it takes to make sure your husband completes his Bachelor's Degree by April 2010. Which includes sending him away for 7 1/2 weeks to take classes at another University (only seeing him on the weekends) and doing his homework for him for his online courses.
• Absence DOES make the Heart grown fonder!
• Chips, cake, and cookie dough provide much needed comfort when you're alone and especially when you're alone at home watching "The Bachelorette."
• Realizing your baby brother REALLY is getting married...since when did he learn how to Kiss and look so cute doing it?!
• Thinking you're the BOMB when you, your mom, and your sister host an awesome (if I say so myself) Bridal Shower for your soon-to-be sister-in-law.
• Feeling so glad when it's over, but still craving the Chinese Chicken Salad!
• Spending a week with my sister is, as always, a blast! Especially when WE get to do the spying and teasing to those who are engaged...life is great when the roles are reversed!
  

Friends

Melissa, Kimberly, Carol

Since our move, last June, I have missed my friends. So much so that it still makes my heart ache whenever I think or talk about it!

Last month, I met up with some good 'ole friends (Melissa from San Diego and Carol my roomy from Ricks) for some much needed "me" time. We decided to reunion at Womens Conference. Let me just say I LOVED it!

I felt like I was in College again...

• We wandered around campus without worrying about the kids or appointments
  
• Stayed up until the wee hours of the morning chatting, giggling, and crying
• We ate great food
• Went to the movies
• Stayed in the DORMS!! (need I say more?)
• Danced
• Just had TONS of FUN!!
  

Thanks girls!! What do ya say we do it again next year!!

Kindergarten Moments

Yesterday, as I was greeting all of my cute Kindergartners for PE, one little girl came up and gave me a HUGE hug and afterward said:

(as she stared at my neck) "What's that?"

I was wearing my whistle and assumed she was talking about the string attached to it that I was wearing around my neck. So, I said:

"Oh, that's the string for my whistle."

She continued to look insistently at my neck and pointed and said, "No, what's that???!!!"

I turned and looked where her finger was pointing.

She was pointing to the huge mole that I have on the back of my neck.

I said to her, "Oh, that's just my mole."

She said, "Well, why don't you just POP it or something!"

Nice.

Kindergartners definitely aren't afraid to tell you how it is...

I think it's time to have my mole removed!

Blonde and Sassy!

Aren't self-portraits the best?

{{can you sense my sarcasm}}

This is the best I can do...my 4-year old probably could have taken a better picture.

Anyway. It's blonde. It's shorter. And, fun to have a change.

The stylist really teased it high and put tons of product in it so it would stay that way. That's probably the main reason Taylor thought I looked so funny.

This picture is a much more tamed down version of the original day.

Gosh, can Summer take any longer to get here...I really need a tan!

Manic Monday

So. Yesterday I spent the ENTIRE morning getting a hair makeover!

Yes! Finally! I found someone who I felt worthy to do my hair. She is cute, sweet, experienced, and oh-so-willing to consult, cut, and hi-light just the way I like it.

Anyway, after a much needed new-DO...I rushed to the Elementary School to teach 3 hours of PE.

Nothing gives you a better self-esteem boost, especially after a new haircut, than 2nd, 3rd, and 4th graders saying "Hey! You cut your hair" or "Hey! I really like your hair." or "Hey! I love your hair Mrs. D."

My self-esteem boost, however, was briefly put on hold during a PE softball game when I called a young 4th grade girl "OUT." She was so mad at me for calling her "OUT" that she sat in the corner, cried, and told all her friends that she "HATES" me.

{{How do I know she hates me, you might ask? Well, in the 4th grade, everyone likes to be in-the-know and likes to make sure if you're not in-the-know that they get you in-the-know.

So. That's how I know.}}

Yes! Like, I said, my self-esteem boost was only briefly put on hold and I was still feeling pretty great until 3 hours later...walking down the hall to greet Taylor and take her home...the look on her face (puzzled and strange) said it all...

But, the look wasn't enough, she just. had. to. say. it. out. LOUD..."Mom, you look funny!"

What a drag!

If this is was Elementary School is like, I am so glad I'm not teaching Middle School!

Making A Re-Appearance...

A day in the life of me...

• Stay up until midnight or later, every other night, completing vinyl lettering orders.
• Wake up at 7am to get the daughter ready for school and out the door.
• Do dishes, maybe throw in some laundry, and finish completing vinyl lettering orders that you were too tired to finish the night before.
• Take a shower and get dressed.
• Rush to the Elementary School to teach 3 hours of P.E.
• After school, hurry and drop off Taylor at dance
• Rush home to finish boxing up orders and deliver them to the post office.
• Sometime, during all of this chaos, figure out what to cook for dinner.
• Rush to the gym to teach Pilates or Dance.
• Hurry home to feed the family and read and practice spelling with Taylor.
• Start to feel tired.
• Bathe the kids and put them to bed.
• Watch your favorite show.
• Go to sleep.

Wake up with a sore throat...two days later find out it's strep!!!

• Be extremely thankful for antibiotics!
• Take lots of naps.
• Love the fact you live with your MIL who can take care of you and the kids!
• Wake up, feel better, and realize you have to get back to work...UGH!

Spend the entire day baking and frosting Valentine Day Cookies!

Realize the work of a mother NEVER ends!

Long Live American Idol!

First of all, I am a huge...HUGE, American Idol fan! After watching the first few seasons (and secretly dreaming of becoming a singer all my life), and with the support of our loving husbands (who voluntarily babysat all weekend) Robyn and I decided to put our singing skills and desire to the test and traveled to Denver, Colorado to audition for American Idol.

Here are some life lessons we learned along the way...

• Don't EVER book a hotel room 1 mile away from Invesco Field with plans of walking to the stadium at 4am! Upon your arrival you will seriously wonder why you valued saving money to rent a car over your personal safety. Thank goodness for thoughtful in-laws who allow you to borrow their car so you don't have to worry about getting mugged at 4am.
• Take an extra pair of comfortable shoes to wear while waiting in line...5-7 hours to be exact! Even if the camera captured you, at a glance, it probably wouldn't see your shoes anyway.
• Be prepared to make new friends who swear you have the best singing voice they've ever heard and vow to be your best friend for life.
• Also, take ear plugs to avoid having to listen to your new friends sing for you, while waiting in line, over and over and over again.
• Know how to tell a good lie when someone asks you to compliment them on their horrific singing skills.
• Always walk through downtown Denver whenever there to visit. The shopping is quaint and super fun!
• Don't plan on getting any sleep in your hotel room. You will be kept up almost all night by sounds of others practicing and singing in the hallways.
• Make sure to ask Chris Daughtry for his autograph while riding on the shuttle with him...he will be one of the biggest stars of the season!
• Just sing your heart out and have fun even though there are practically thousands auditioning at the same time.
• Try not to snap at your BFF and sister when the process is over. Rather, realize you are both really, really tired and anxious to get home.
• Last, but not least, don't EVER wear your new pink American Idol t-shirt in the airport because it will make annoying boys think you want to sing your heart out to them and everyone else in the lobby.
  

So. Here's to a new season! Can't wait to watch tonight at 7pm!

I Can't Believe it's OVER!

Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house
Every child was strung out on candy and leaping and running all about the house.

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care
While the children (already strung out on sugar and candy) decorated cookies for Santa to share.

The family anxiously awaited turkey and trimmings to eat
While myself and grandma hurried to get it ready--it was quite the feat!

After opening Christmas Eve PJ's and getting the children all snug in their beds
Santa, and his helper, hurried to wrapped presents in blues, silvers, and reds.

Almost ready for Christmas, interrupted with sounds of screaming, while still wrapping presents,
I ran down the stairs to find a little one crying and throwing up, what seemed to be, gallons.

With a bath, some kisses, and new clean pajamas
We were ready to sleep deep without any shouts or yo mamas!

Without much sleep, Christmas morning finally arrived,
The children were giggling and full of jive!

Traditional pictures on the stairs was a must,
And then off to open presents starting with the youngest.

The air was filled with lots of ooh's and aah's,
And when it was over, I sighed with a pause...

The joy of Christmas is wonderful and sweet,
and this year we enjoyed it and felt quite complete!

Adventures

Uncle Curtis warmed up the helicopter yesterday and took us all for a ride. Taylor, Blake, and myself all got to go....here we are strapping in and getting ready to take off.
Now, the pictures are all jumbled and out of order...but here we are safely landing and putting our feet on the ground.
Luke and Devon didn't ride. Devon was too nervous and since Luke has had the flu, I couldn't imagine anything worse than throw-up--especially in a confined space hundreds of feet above the ground...so he didn't go, but he had a blast watching the helicopter take off and land.
Here we are coming in for a landing...whew! Look at that sunset!
These are the first two pictures of us taking off. Neither Taylor or Blake screamed...they loved it! Blake kept waving out the window. I, on the other hand, was okay until we were in the air. It is way different looking out the window of a helicopter than an airplane because the window goes all the way to the floor...it takes your breath away!
Luckily, for me, since the kids were with me, Curtis spared me of his dare devil ride! My stomach was queasy enough as it was. The canyons were beautiful and the ride was awesome! Thanks Curtis!

Who Me?

I admit it! I am either having bloggers-block, or my life has turned completely boring...which explains the lack of posts.

I could write and tell you about Disco Dancing with 4th Graders, today's Primary Program {{Luke memorized his part--very cute}}, or my NEW Vinyl Lettering hits!

I could also tell you about my friends dog getting shot for stealing a chicken {{I told you I can't relate to this place}}, getting my hair cut and high-lighted by a newbie at the salon, being invited to my first official "girls night out" here in CC {{maybe there is hope for me here after all}} and visiting, in person, with one of my best friends from SD this weekend {{w00-hoo}}

However, I figured since I have been tagged numerous times...it was time to make good on one of those tags. So. Here it goes, 6 Quirks about me!

1. I cannot go to bed without brushing my teeth or washing my face! No matter how tired I am, I always force myself to cleanse, tone, and moisturize my face and brush and floss my teeth!

2. I have said this before, but I L.O.V.E. musicals and teenage flicks. When I was in Elementary School, I really wanted my life to be a musical. I would skip around the playground, at recess, singing "dumb dog why are you following me...," or "do a deer a female deer, ray a drop of golden sun...."

3. When showering and getting dressed, I always do everything in the EXACT same order. I always put on my makeup BEFORE drying my hair. When applying my makeup, I always start on the right side of my face and can't put on eyeliner before eyeshadow, etc. I also, always, wear makeup! It's a rare thing if you see me without it or with just mascara on.

4. I workout everyday. Sometimes twice a day...those are the days that I teach at the gym. If I don't workout I start to feel stressed out and anxious. Exercise always calms my anxieties. Also, when I jog on the treadmill, my mind can't handle it if I don't start on my right foot, and, if I increase the speed or incline on an odd minute. For example, I can't increase the speed at 1:58, it has to be on 2:00 EXACTLY.

5. I can't sleep in. This is an inherited curse from my father {{thanks Dad}}. My brain starts to wake up before the kids do and once my brain is awake, there is no turning back!

6. I love dogs, but extremely dislike cats and rabbits. I'm not sure why, but holding a cat or rabbit disgusts me. I can't stand how you can feel their bones through their skin when you're holding them. I think I must have grown up around a lot of scary neighborhood cats when I was a kid or something....anyway?!

Just the Two of Us

For our birthdays, Devon's parents watched the kids while we took off to sunny, warm, St. George.

It's funny how dramatically life changes after having kids. Looking back, it's hard to remember what we talked about or did together before having them.

This weekend away was much needed and it was good to experience being just the two of us again.

It's surprising how much you can do when you're not towing around three little ones with you everywhere you go.

• We saw two movies
• Were able to eat out without feeling rushed to hurry and finish before the kids started getting restless. It's amazing how much greater the food tastes when you actually get to chew AND swallow.
• Shop. Oh, how I miss shopping. Shopping is not the same when you are looking for little ones hiding in the clothes racks, chasing them down the isles, or wrestling with one in your arms while you try to pay the bill.
• Hold hands.
• Stay up late and watch movies without feeling worried about being woken up during the middle of the night.
• Sleep in
• Shower without being interrupted by screaming/fighting children and having to negotiate with them to get along while washing my hair.
• Quiet car rides.

Needless to say, we had a great time together...but we really missed the kids and were anxious to get home to see them!

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